Happy 35th Birthday, Hubby!!

Dear Honey,

Happy 35th Birthday for you, although i dont have present for you, but i’ll give you my best for always beside you forever, wish you always stay healthy, live long and happy cause you’re great husband for me, let us fighting together for our dream and future. i’ll always support you, no matter what you do as long it is logically make sense for us.
you never mad with me, even with my attitude as always behave like spoiled kid, you always patient with everything in front of you. every trouble always we’ve been through together.

i don’t want a fancy car, jewelry, or castle from you, i only want to live long with you, have a couple kids, gets old and have grandchildren. teaching them how to live our life happily ever after.

we fight and we fun together.

i love you, i always do..


26th Birthday Present

Yesterday its my 26th birthday, and its amazing. Ive got full day service from husband. Hes take day off, special for me.. birthday present not always as a real present. We can do something precious for someone special on birthday, like my husband did for me hehe.. we can see each other everyday after work, but rarely to meet each other at such busy time like this year ..

Im 26 yg artinya sudah memasuki umur menuju tua, berasa beban banget ya tua hahaha.. full year i was worried about everything, worried about future, takut tidak bakalan sesuai dengan rencana, khawatir berlebihan.. trlalu banyak hal yg dikhawatirkan ujung2 malah jadi frustasi sendiri.. jadi dedikasi ku tahun ini, berharap sedikit boleh daripada bnyak berharap, lebih baik jalani aja yg sudah berjalan.. tidak berlebihan memikirkan wishlist2 dan hal2 yg dianggap selalu harus tercapai.. malah bikin aku ga enjoy sama diri sendiri.. i really miss myself.. it doesnt mean aku ga enjoy sama diriku sndiri. Hanya saja kurang bebas mengekspresikan all about meee… Maklum lah skrng kan sudah bersuami harus lebih tau dan menjaga mana tang baik dan mana yang buruk.. thinking seriously about future.. harus nekad. ata2 itu sudah jarang sekali terucap di benakku, perawakan cerita seenaknya sendiri, and i dont care feeling, that feeling has gone long time ago.. but now i knew sometimes that i really need those kind of feeling to face the world..

I need to learn everything for the begining now, its difficult but i must try it.. thats i need to be a mom on the future, to many worries make me so soft.. and i hate that, sometime my husband always underestimate my own abilities because my spoiled attitude, and its a must.. semangat!!!

Yes im  really happy but too happy make a difference. I really enjoy my life with him, too enjoyso  make me lazy haha..

Anyway January 4, as my 26 birthday. Aku ga ngarepin hadiah or surprise apapun. Pengenku cuma satu, my hubby terus selalu sehat.. dan berubah mulai care dengan kesehatannya sendiri, tanpa harus aku ingetin terus.. AKu dah bosen ngingetin dia trus. tapi ga selalu didengerin.. Sudah bikin jadwal semua biar ga berlebihan, such as.. ngopi, makan kambing.. meskipun i need lamb beef actually karena bagus buat ku karena sering banget kalo lagi datang haid, ato kelelahan sehabis begadang. Tensiku langsung drop drastis.. nah kalo dah begitu cara cepetnya cuma satu makan kambing..

Disolo menu kambing ya specialis kambing ga ada resto Chinese nyediain menu kambing, thats why i cant eat lamb everyday.. jadi dijadwalin biar ga excessive konsumsi kambing.. yah kadang suamiku sendiri suka nglanggar. Tepok jidat sarapan pake kopi, diajak makan kambing gelem (mau). Alasannya mumpung gratis.. yah kadang nyebelin juga pas mendadak pulang2 sudah dalam keadaan tidak bertenaga sehabis kena serangan mendadak kolesterol atau glukom.. yikess!!! Sama dengan no time for me at home for todays… haha.. plus kalo ditanyain pasti bilangnya ngga..

Im young maybe too young when compared with him, but who else would remind him that im as his wife. My energy was still alot more if compare to him. I cant imagine if i have a baby boy.. which is more more younger than him.. he needs his energy to compare and play with lil son.. (cant wait for pregnant)

Speaking of pregnant

i really want to have a baby.. suamiku kadang menyepelekan aku siap apa ga aku jadi ibu.. harusnya sudah siap mental yaa. Secara i love babies. since i was kids. Also i have alots experience of babysitting. I was babysitting my neighborhood babies at a year old. Sometimes enjoy playing with them. I have young brother when i was 14. And its amazing to take care of him.. saw moms breastfeeding.. giving him nutrient food. Saw my mom struggled with morning sickness to delivery baby.. (yg sebelumnya aku kira ibuku terkena kanker haha) i should learn much from her. My families dont need baby sitter for take care their own daughter and son. Daripada ngabisin duid buat orang yang masih diragukan kepercayaannya lebih baik diurus sendiri. Bahkan kalo kita terlalu sibuk ngurus kerja an. I still have mother in law.. to help me baby sitting.. sama seperti dulu ibuku di temenin nenek buat ngasuh aku ..

Takut aku ga siap? Come on try me honey.. but psycically.. i need to prepare alot of thing before pregnant. ibuku kalo ditanyain macem2 tentang hamil pasti jawabannya .. “biasa aja hamil ya hamil ga ada yg lebay2”.. makan juga biasa aja.. Dan buktinya skrng anaknya gede2 sehat. Sampe yg kecilpun melahirkan di umur 40an jg sehat ..

Mungkin memang sih bisa dibilang ga masalah kalo mau hamil gitu aja.. semakin sering googling cari experiece mommies diluar sana malah bikin makin khawatir. Banyak moms diluar sana kejebak sama artikel bahkan forum yg curhat dan jadi kepikiran sama persiapan macem2 sebelum pregnant bahkan konsul ke dokter ob yg rata2 bilng nya sama.. justru bikin moms kebanyakan jadi kepikiran soal biaya yang mahal dan menyebabkan bikin ga jadi2 hamil nya.. mencari referensi boleh. But do over think and do it.. gimana orng2 yg hidupnya susah, tpi bisa punya puluhan anak.. “our bodies build for that.. trust your own body” quote ini bikin aku makin confident. ketimbang mengkhawaitrkan isi artikel/forum. Just let it flow..

At least psychical harus siap saat ada factor x terjadi. Itu kenapa harus melalui sejumlah ritual sebelum kehamilan.. sound creepy but it a must at least you know what to do.. hehe Anyways.. this year of later, i start make a list what to do. ill share it its embrasing or not.. ill promise to share..

End of this pregnancy chat..

As 26 present

Suamiku ambil libur special buat nemenin aku dihari special, we est breakfast at mcdonald. Mulai bosan dengan menu breakfastnya sih haha.. setelah itu kita berangkat menuju rumah teh ndoro dongket.. we travel up to the top of the hill, enjoying tea field.. motor maticnya smpe kecapean hahaha. Badan ku juga udah ga kuat nahan beban.. terlalu curam.. saking ga pernah olahraga, naek motor aja bisa capee.. i have spoiled body.. my god U_U

Setelah mutusin buat turun. Ndoro dongker nya sudah buka. Wah disana beneran enjoy.. spend time together so relax.. pulngnya kita makan siang di kafe biru. Eat Chinese food . And im full.. Sudah kenyang banget. Dan habis itu masih ke sharetea.. my fave..

Whole day spending time and money together only for me.. No cake, no surprise, no real present.. its alright.. all i need is him to be my side.. thats means everythinh to me..

Thanks for everything.. thank you my husband.. always love you no matter what

Happy 34th birthday!!!

Yesterday was my belove husband birthday, no party, no cake, no surprise for that day.. because i wasnt able yet to go anywhere without him.. little bit bland but i can do little things for him and try with all my heart to give him small present..

With words. Only words can describe a gift.. this year was our very first year on his birthday, as husband and wife.. i only have little bit surprise for him in the mid of the night..

Twelve o’clock, on 20 march 2013, i wake him up with small singing happy birthday song with warm huge around him..
With sleepy face, he woke up and then i gave him kiss. and says

“happy birthday honey, youre getting old now so please stay health and will always love you forever.. hahaha..”

For the night, We have candle light dinner in one of resto in town, share our food and drink, telling a story.. etc.

This year no matter what we have been through, we will always supporting each other.. and also keep wishes for next year.. sure we can do it together..

I love you papa, love you forever..